Al-Fatihah..

Salam,

Yesterday we were given a very sad news.. Tok (my dear hubby's grandfather) has passed away.. He was sick on Friday and was admitted to the hospital.. and my inlaws decided that he was for supportive care only, given his age and overall fitness.. they were told to be prepared for the worse.. and on Saturday,he passed away...

When I got the news from Erin, Shaz has just left for work.. I tried to call him but at the same time my mother in law was actually on the phone, delivering the news to him.. and then he called me back and there was sadness in his voice.. he told me that mum (my MIL) has told him.. and I don't know what else to say to him other than asking him,'are you ok?'.. and he replied, 'I don't know'.. and there was a long pause.. I wish I was there with him when he got the news.. I wish I could find the right words but my mind just went blank.. he was trying hard to calm himself and so was I..

Tok has played a big role in my hubby's life.. I would say I didn't get to spend much time with Tok.. in fact, I just met him for a few times.. but I've heard a lot of stories about him from my dear hubby (and from my MIL & SIL as well).. all the happy & funny stories.. and from the way he told the stories, I knew that Tok is part of his happiness.. and of course part of his life & his memory since childhood..

Last picture with arwah.. taken a few weeks ago..

I remember the story that he told me, which happened when he was in the boarding school.. Tok went visiting him when he was in MCKK.. Tok came by the gate (not the front gate) and ask one of the schoolboys to find my hubby.. and when he arrived, Tok threw a durian over the gate for him! Tok would asked my MIL about my hubby every now and then.. he would cook his ever famous & delicious lamb curry every time we went back to visit him.. I know for sure that Tok loves his grandchildren very much.. my dear hubby also told me about how Tok would make sure that his grandchildren have their dinner.. there were times that he would dragged them and sat them beside him and he would feed them himself.. one of the funny things that Shaz could not forget was that Tok liked to watch the tamil news, a long time ago.. Shaz was merely a boy at that time, and with his cousins,they would sat in front of the TV to watch cartoons.. but as soon as the Tamil news started,Tok would switched the channel.. and nobody could switched the channel back.. ;)

Tok has been a very independent man.. He would do anything he wanted in his own way.. he was a strict man.. his 'best friend' - his motorcycle.. countless times people offered him a ride but his choice would almost always be his own ride.. even until just recently, he still ride his motorcycle, at the age of over 80.. he was the treasurer for the death khairat in the kampung for 23 years.. he has been close with the people & the mosque.. for 23 years, he did his work efficiently..

we'll miss you..

I love to hear stories of his youth.. When he was young, he used to work with a British man, Tuan Grant, who became a close friend of his.. he used to work as a 'pongkah pola' (fan curve puller)- I think!.. and that was the era of the communists.. If I was not mistaken, his work have a lot to do with taking care of the estate/forest.. whenever he went into the forest with Tuan Grant, there was always the danger of being attacked by the communists.. he remembered Tuan Grant very well.. when we went to see him last month, he did again tell us some story about Tuan Grant..

I'll miss his story & I'll miss the sight of him.. sitting on his favourite chair in front of the TV.. doing his own things.. no matter how hectic it was around him, with kids screaming, running or jumping, or when we were chit chatting like crazy, he would stay relaxed in his chair.. like nothing could bother him.. he didn't say much, he made a few remarks sometimes.. a few small cit chats.. but his presence that was important.. and I guess the house will never be the same without him..

I'm glad that we had the chance to visit him last month.. when we were paying a visit to Opah's grave, he showed us some empty spaces nearby and said that he would like to be buried in the same graveyard.. as if he knew that his time was near..

We all will miss him.. he will stay dear to our hearts.. we were told that he passed away peacefully.. with no difficulty.. and so many people turned up for his funeral.. alhamdulillah.. it gives us some peace in our hearts.. in this midst of grieving, everyone is still trying to cope.. the sadness will surely stay but hopefully it'll heal with time.. we will keep him in our hearts and remember him in our prayers, insyaAllah.. he has raised his children and his grandchildren very well.. he has done lots of good deeds throughout his life..

'O Allah! Forgive our living and our dead, those of us who are present and
those who are absent, our young and our old, our males and our females,
those of us who are present, and those who are absent. O Allah!
Whomsoever among us You keep alive, make him to live in Islam, and
whomsoever You cause to die, let him die in faith. O Allah! Do not deprive
us of our reward for (supplicating for) him, and cause us not to go astray'

I'm probably not the best person to write about Tok.. what I've written here is just a small part of his life.. and I'm sorry if what I wrote is wrong or not accurate..