Inadequate..

Salam..

Today is literally just the fourth day I am working in the Renal team.. Despite the short experience, much has happened.. More appropriately, this week has been very busy, not helped by the recent weekend call..

The first day started off fairly well with a very quick ward round by the consultant.. Then, the usual inpatient jobs to be done.. Even that I finished at 5pm, one hour after my rostered working hour.. Of course it didn't matter that much as I was practically oncall on the Friday.. Nevertheless, it was not looking like a good start for the weekend..

Post-call on Monday and we started off with a ward round.. Again, the usual jobs afterwards.. I wasn't complaining although my whole body was just about to crash with exhaustion.. I was holding on to the last drop of calorie I had in my body..

Tuesday was far from better.. We started off with the rounds in the morning, then clinic in the afternoon.. As you may already know, it was huge! I left hospital around 7.30pm.. This is probably one of the latest time I had left hospital on a not-oncall day..

Today.. Same again.. We did the rounds in the morning - including some hassle with patients almost missing the theatre list.. Alhamdulillah, both of them managed to squeeze their luck through today.. Otherwise, my brain is on the line! Ultimately, at 2 minutes before 5pm, I was called to admit an elective patient for a kidney biopsy tomorrow.. I had thought of leaving that to the oncall team to do it, but I just counld not risk the man not having his procedure done tomorrow if anything were not done pre-procedure.. So I stayed and did the job myself.. Ina had to wait for me and she did help with sending the bloods.. As far as I am concerned, he is ready to go tomorrow! Of course, that meant I only left hospital late around 7pm and reached home 5 minutes later.. This is the second day in a row I am stuck to get the job done..

Less Than Inadequate

The busy renal job means that there is a lot of opportunity to learn and pick up experience along the way.. However, it also is an eye-opener and show how much I don't know about my specialty.. Now, that's not great at all! The feeling of inadequate is just NOT GOOD!

I need to step up! And I don't know how I am going to do it.. Even worse! Well, I'll take it day by day and see where I can improve and work on that..

As for tonight, I am just taking my time resting.. Ina is starting at 7am tomorrow and I may well opt to go to work at the same time.. I am starting at 8am but I don't think the hassle of sending her off to work, come back home and go back to work is worth my time and energy.. I might as well get ready early and sort a few things out before I start at eight anyway.. I got to go to bed or I won't wake up tomorrow!

Salam..